Part I
What might stop you from going as far as you want? Maybe nothing. You have gone forward in your life and in your career by successfully moving through any barriers that have shown up along the way. Most of us have gotten to where we are today because we have been able to surmount difficulties that have presented themselves. Yet, there are both internal and external barriers that often stop us or slow us down in the process.
Internal Barriers/Disabling Perspectives
Obstacles that arise from the internal world spring from an inner commentary, or back story we have going on in our heads that provides a continuous flow of information about what will work, what won't, what we can do, what we can't, and so on. And although you have arrived at a place that you most likely feel very good about, consider that much of what might stop you from taking certain actions may originate from that place.
The comments of this inner world often stem from unexamined assumptions and beliefs that inform the actions we take and thus the outcomes we get. These assumptions and beliefs are the basis for the perspective we hold about ourselves, others, and situations. When we have a disabling perspective on a situation, we often take actions, even though we might not be conscious of them, that will lead to an outcome that may not be what we would have wanted. Likewise, if we have an enabling perspective on a situation -- a positive attitude about it -- we'll take actions, conscious or not, that generally lead to a positive outcome.
Amy's Situation
Let's bring this to life by taking one question from the personal brand assessment as an example. The first question under the heading "Attitude" is "I am comfortable promoting my brand."
Amy gave herself a 3 on the "I'm comfortable promoting my brand." question. That means she's probably on the fence about promoting her brand. For example purposes, let's say Amy's perspective on brand promotion has 2 parts to it. One perspective is: "only people who are full of themselves -- like all ego - actively promote their brand without being asked." And the second to this is "But it's okay to casually mention accomplishments if someone asks you about them." (This is an on-the-fence attitude -- for Amy, promoting her brand is ONLY okay under certain conditions.
But what if the one condition she's set for herself, and that is, "I'll promote myself only when asked" rarely or never happens. Like what if no one, outside of her manager, ever asks her? What then? Well, given the perspective she's taking on it, no one is likely to know what Amy does. And if they don't know what she does, what she's known for -- her brand -- then moving ahead in her career becomes more by chance than by design.
About Perspectives. It's very important to unearth your perspectives or attitudes when you notice that there's something that could be helpful to you that you're not doing. You need to bring your perspectives into the light so that you can do a reality check on them. You can do that simply by asking yourself, "What's the perspective I'm taking on this?" Is it a disabling one --one that'll stop me in my career (in Amy's case, hers is "I'll only promote myself if asked") or is your perspective enabling -- an attitude that gives you confidence to move on?
In order to best understand this, I recommend that you do a four-part quick exercise on disabling perspectives so you can see how the process of breaking down one of these perspectives goes.
Get out a letter-size piece of paper and draw a large circle that just about fills the page. Draw 4 squares or blocks big enough to write in, one at 12 o'clock, one at 3 o'clock, one at 6 o'clock and one at 9 o'clock. Label the 12:00 block, Amy's disabling perspective. Label the 3:00 block, "back story or "head noise" . The 6:00 block is "actions" and the 9:00 block is Outcome. Again, the blocks are disabling perspective, back story, actions, outcome.
In this exercise we'll examine Amy's disabling cycle -- the four blocks.
1. Disabling Perspective. We start with the disabling perspective at 12 o'clock -- This is the belief that someone might have about themselves, someone else or a situation that they simply accept as true. In Amy's case, her perspective is, "Only those people who are full of themselves promote their brand without invitation" It's disabling because with a perspective like that, Amy will end up saying to herself "….and so I can't promote my brand because people will think I'm ego driven." Or something like that. Notice how the perspective she's taken has an attached back story (the back story goes in the 3:00 box) and that story follows right on from the perspective and usually starts with ….. "and so I can't…. bla bla bla or whatever."
2. Inner Commentary. Here's what it sounds like in Amy's head, "Only those people who are full of themselves promote their brand without invitation…, a. and so I can't promote my brand because people will think I'm ego driven. Or b. and so I can't promote my brand because it's boasting, and boasting is wrong. Or c. and so I can't promote my brand because I'll seem like I'm over the top and that's just gonna turn people off. You see what I mean. You have a disabling perspective in the 12 o'clock block… that has a back story at 3:00 that starts with "…and so I can't… and bla bla bla. We all have back stories. Everyone's story has its own familiar narrative, constantly dispensing advice. Much of that "counsel" comes from long-held, unexamined perspectives that we consider to be fact, but in truth have little or no substance.
3. Actions. Okay, so with a disabling perspective at 12 o'clock and a back story at 3:00 that strongly keeps that disabling perspective in place, we move on to the 6:00 square which we're calling Actions. The Actions Amy takes will be a direct result of her perspective and back story. And given Amy's back story, her action will be NO ACTION, which, by the way, is still an action….. Here's what Amy won't do, she won't actively promote herself.
4. Outcome. And the result of that, which is the outcome that Amy would put in the 9:00 square is - "My work doesn't get noticed. I don't move ahead in my career the way I'd like."
When you go through a 4-part cycle like this, you can get to see how your perspective shapes your actions that lead to the outcome. Once you do that, once you take yourself through this cycle, you've got the chance to turn things around. In Part 2 of this article, you'll learn how to do that.
And before you read that article and do the second half of this exercise, examine the perspectives that are possibly holding you back. Take a stab at the inner commentary, the actions you either have taken or would take if you're holding onto a negative perspective, and the likely outcome of those actions, and see what you get. Then you can apply that to the enabling perspective that I'll cover next week.
Part II
A disabling perspective, or attitude, frame of mind, or whatever you personally call it, is a way of thinking that keeps you stuck.
In Part 1 of this 2-part article series, I talked about Amy and we cycled through her disabling perspective about promoting her brand. In Part 2 I'll be taking you through a shift in attitude -- an enabling perspective -- that Amy could take so that she can get herself out of "stuck" mode and into promoting herself with more ease.
As I have been saying, what we think, what we believe, is generally what will come to pass. So if you have a disabling perspective on a situation, you'll take actions, even though you might not be conscious of it, that might lead to an outcome that may not be what you would have wanted.
Likewise, if you have an enabling perspective on a situation -- a positive attitude about it -- you'll take actions, conscious or not, that generally lead to a positive outcome.
Let's review Amy's situation. Amy believes two things, one is "only people who are full of themselves -- like all ego - actively promote their brand without being asked" And the second thing she believes is that it's okay to casually mention accomplishments if someone asks you about them."
She's set one condition for brand promotion for herself, and that is, "I'll promote myself only when asked" . And if that rarely or never happens, no one will know enough about what she does to consider her a star worth promoting.
Amy -- going from a disabling to an enabling perspective
In Part 1 you drew a large circle on a letter-sized piece of paper with four blocks big enough to write in, one each at 12:00 o'clock, 3:00, 6:00 and 9:00. I'll ask you to do the same now because we're going to form an enabling perspective for Amy.
If Amy's disabling perspective -- the 12 O'clock slot was. "only those people who are full of themselves promote their brand without invitation" before we create an enabling perspective with four different and more positive blocks, I'd ask Amy - and you should ask yourself for your own disabling perspectives -- "What's the evidence for that?"
My next question would be,
Denise: "Well so Amy, how have you seen people effectively promote their value-add, their brand, in situations where they haven't been asked directly?"
What I'm doing here is taking her disabling perspective and making a more creative question out of it because I'm assuming that there are people out there who can effectively promote their brand without waiting to be asked. And this type of question causes Amy to think beyond the perspective that's keeping her stuck.
She could come up with answers like,
Amy: "Well, I've seen people give project updates during management meetings that give senior management useful information that's helpful to them and at the same time they're letting management know what they do and the value that they bring, especially when the updates are positive.
Denise: "So It's more 'reporting' than "bragging."
Amy: "Ya, right, I guess you could say that."
Denise: "Good, what else have you seen people do, especially people you like and admire, to promote their brand, their value-add, without needing to be asked directly?"
Amy might say, that she's seen Erika, a senior director she thinks well of, often mention in casual conversation with senior staff what her team is working on.
Amy: "Again, Erika's giving this info as a type of update of what others need to hear -- that they find useful. And sometimes I've seen people I think well of send out update emails to the need-to-know people. That's another way."
Once I hear Amy give those examples, what I might say back to her is,
Denise: "So when you've seen people "reporting" their results in formal meetings and "updating" the need-to-know people in more casual settings or via email, then it's okay to talk about your value-add -- because you're talking about your results? Is that right?
What I'm doing is asking Amy for evidence to the contrary about her disabling perspective. You need to do that to shake yourself loose from a stuck perspective. She might say,
Amy: "We'll yes it is, as long as what I'm telling them is useful to them.
And that's the point. You should be passing on information that's useful to people. Useless info makes people think you're just tooting your own horn. But when what you tell them is useful and helpful to them, their attitude about you is markedly different.
And once you've got a more enabling way to look at any perspective that's keeping you stuck, it's easy to create the other 3 parts to this new perspective that you can put in to practice.
So for the 12:00 slot on the enabling perspective Amy could say something like,
"It's perfectly okay to talk about my value-add -- my best results -- when I'm 'reporting' or 'updating' those who need to know."
The 3:00 slot, which is the back story that supports Amy's enabling perspective now becomes something like,
"With the knowledge I pass on, I enable people to do a better job in their own areas. With my report, it adds to the knowledge people need to get their jobs done well."
The 6:00 Action slot now becomes,
"I'll map out what I think people need to know and I'll look for good opportunities to share what I know, what I've done, that will be helpful info for them."
And the 9:00 slot, the Outcome from her actions is that,
"People know what I'm doing. I've promoted my brand, my value-add, in a way that fits with my value system and I feel good about it."
How You Can Use This
1. Take a disabling perspective, see what your back story or head noise about it is that's keeping that belief in place, notice the disabling actions you take and the outcomes that you get as a result of that perspective.
2. Then look for evidence contrary to your disabling perspective. Evidence that refutes the perspective you've got held in place. If you can't break yourself free form that thinking, ask a good friend to help you.
3. Once you've got a new way to look at the situation, you can easily craft an enabling perspective, complete with a good supporting back story, actions you'll take and likely outcomes as a result of your actions. The next thing to do is put your enabling perspective into practice.
And there you go. That's the whole process. If you want to get deeper into this, take the brand seminar, Your Brand Matters. You'll get to explore your disabling perspectives in depth and free yourself from what's keeping you stuck or holding you back.
(c) 2009-2010 Denise Brouillette, San Francisco, CA. All Rights Reserved.
